"How's your day going?" LAME ... too obvious. Hmmmm ... what about ...
"So ... got a funny story for you." But I don't have a funny story ... shit. Ummmmm ...
"Wazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzup?" Trying too hard to be casual ...
Oh the screen went blank! Better press a button in case I missed a text ... oh, still no text.
Has this ever been you? If not, then you are probably one of the few sane people left in the singles world these days. With absolute and total interconnectedness via the web, mobile devices, social networks, etc., we have a bajillion ways of contacting each other at any given moment. We've gotten so incredibly used to instant interaction between friends, family members, and coworkers that we expect it in dating as well. With a brisk movement of the fingers and a click of a button, you can express any wish or desire to whomever you choose. And let's be honest here, it makes staying in touch so much easier. Who wants to spend 30 minutes on the phone with someone to let them know you're thinking of them when you could simply "like" their picture on facebook and type "You look faboosh girlfriend! Miss you!!!!!!!!"? Who has time for phone calls these days between status updates, tweets, and text messaging?!
So what does this mean for the dating world you ask? Lots.
Gone are the days when you had to grow a pair and call someone to ask them out. I mean, you REALLY had to like someone in order to pick up the phone and put yourself out there right? Why would you risk the rejection and embarrassment unless he or she was worth it? Ok ok ... I'm simplifying things a little here. Yes, people still got mixed signals in the 90's and people still got rejected and embarrassed. BUT ... it was a lot more difficult to feign interest or lead someone on for the fun of it when you had to do it face to face.
Don't get me wrong ... I'm not blaming other people here! I'm just as guilty as anyone else. How many times have I gotten a message from someone online, knew right away that I had no intention of ever really going out with that person, but sent a few flirty messages or texts his way anyways because it was just so easy to do!? What repercussions are there? You never have to come face to face with this person if you don't want to! Ok, I'm exaggerating again to prove a point, but you get my drift. All this technology in the dating world means less accountability.
And you know what else? There is just something to be said for old fashioned flirting. You can send all the winks, happy faces, tongue out faces and "xo"s you want, but none of that compares to meeting each other's eyes across a crowded room. Or how about when a guy puts his hand on the small of your back and bends close to your ear to tell you something? HOT DAMN!!!!! That's right ladies, you know what I'm talking about. And if any of you men are reading this ... do us ladies a solid and do more of that. Please and thank you.
So by now you are probably saying "Well why does she bother with online dating if all she's gonna do is b^#$* about it?"
It has it's advantages. First of all, it ain't easy to meet men/women these days. Take me, for example. I work a lot and I enjoy the people I work with so I socialize with them. I have friends outside of work as well, but they are either already in a couple or they move in the same circle as me so the chances of a hot, single, respectable man coming into the circle via one of them aren't that great. What do online dating sites offer? Not only a multitude of single men who are also looking for an awesome gal like me, but I get to weed out the creepy ones!
"Hey babe ... wanna be my princess?" Not likely. DELETE
"Girl ... you are fine." Without you ... yes, I know. Thanks for confirming. DELETE
"I wanna throw you on the hood of my car and smack that ..." DELETE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wait maybe ... JUST KIDDING! DELETE
"Read your profile and I've gotta say, I love your smile. You seem like a really genuine girl with a good head on her shoulders. Check me out and send me a message if you're interested!" Well ... don't mind if I do PrettyBoy81.
Granted, anyone could pretend to be sweet and genuine with the sole purpose of getting into your pants. But that could happen anywhere ... not just online. At least you can weed out the obvious douchebags.
What about you folks? What do you see as the biggest advantages/disadvantages of technology in the dating world?
Until next time and happy fishing ;)
Well Laura, I must say I have read each and everyone of ur blogs and as I sit here, I have tears rolling out of my eyes from laughter... yes us single women have done all of thee above, including me. got bored one weekend here sat alone in my apartment and decided to see what was out there in the world of the web.. POF u say.. more like sculpins. I did however met a few of them.. some were wanting booty calls, which makes u feel less of a woman.. then I sit alone thinking, what are these men seeing in me that I don't.. do i look like the one night stander.. not that I was aware of. So POF was deleted. I read the book by Steve Harvey " Act like a lady, think like a man ".. every single woman should have a read. Its a book u can't put down. He states that women should wait at least 3 months before giving up the proverbial COOKIE.. u would wait that long before getting life insurance, so why not test the waters and see what kind of man would wait 3 whole, long , agonizing months. Bet the cookie would be worth it..lol... But here I sit a 38 yr old single woman , who had decided to give herself 1 full year to choose ME before I even consider a WE.. I have learned alot in these past 10 months, how to deal with loneliness and get use to doing it solo... one day I hope to met a great man, but now I have standards.. and I don't feel one bit bad knowing someone don't give me a call back after a first date.. just haven't found the one who gives me that spark.. go to Oprah's website and there is a story there about a woman who dated a 100 men online.. until she found the one.. think I will stick to my 80's personality and do it the old fashion way.. All the best with the fishing.. Tracy
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