Tuesday, October 5, 2010

POF vs Eharmony: The battle of love

How many of you have seen the Eharmony commercials and thought for a brief second "That could be me!"?  Your head tilts slowly to the side and you gaze at the TV in awe of this happy couple ... who just happen to have amazing bodies, beautiful white-toothed smiles, and soft hair blowing in the breeze.  Well, let me state the obvious here for a second ... who wouldn't have chemistry with these people?  They're part of the beautiful people club! (Any Family Guy fans out there?  Beautiful people club? No? Moving on ... )

In all seriousness, Eharmony does have much better marketing and finesse than Plenty of Fish, but is it really worth the monthly fee?  What are they providing that POF isn't?  I pondered this for a long time until I finally bit the bullet (and emptied my wallet) and joined a couple of months ago.  Now ... I present to you my findings.

1. The Eharmony questionnaire

Eharmony will have you believe that it's matching capabilities are far superior to that of any other dating site thanks to it's SAT level questionnaire.  How much personal space do you need in a relationship?  How important is sexual chemistry to you?  Do you want children?  Eharmony will stop at nothing, will leave no deep, burning question unanswered in order to uncover your innermost personality traits.  YOU ... are a confident, easy-going person who values family and alone time.  OH ... MY ... GOD.  Eharmony just stared right into my soul.

Yes, the questionnaire takes 3 hours to complete and yes, there are a ton of questions.  However, I honestly didn't feel like I was being probed any deeper than any other dating site had probed.  If this is the basis on which Eharmony matches you with other people, you may as well get matched for free elsewhere.

2. Eharmony delivers matches to you every day! (And so does every other site ... except with E-ho, that's what I'm calling it from now on, you only get the matches they send you and you can't search for anyone else.)

On the very first day I joined, I received over 200 matches.  Cha-ching.  I was like a kid in a candy store!  Gimme some of dat! And dat! And dat!  I spent three hours going through all the matches and "archiving" the ones I wasn't interested in.  This left me with a reduced list of 5.  Did I mention I was picky?  We'll talk about that another time.

Then, with my reduced list of 5, I started sifting through the profiles one by one and sending messages ... except ... wait!  I didn't send messages ... I sent "GUIDED FORMS OF COMMUNICATION".

3.  Guided Forms of Communication aka Communication for Dummies

E-ho doesn't leave anything to chance my friends.  God knows we are all incapable of constructing an introductory message to a stranger ourselves, so E-ho has developed a multi-tiered system that takes you deeper and deeper inside your future soulmate's heart and soul.  Unless you opt out and decide to just send a message, but they don't recommend that.  That's cheating.  You must first pass through the mythical land of "Getting to know each other" via multiple choice questions.  Ahhhhh, yes ... multiple choice questions.  Upon successfully answering these questions, you will advance to the treacherous world of "Must haves and can't haves".  Many a couple has parted ways upon revealing the true meaning of "I must have an affectionate partner" or "I can't tolerate an inconsiderate attitude."  The third and final stage (and presumably the most dangerous ... ) is the "Learn more about him/her" stage.  To be honest, I can't even comment on this stage as I was never courageous nor strong enough to conquer the previous two stages.  I can only assume that what is revealed upon completing this stage of guided communication is so intense, so true, and so profound that both parties immediately surrender to the power of love.

Or you could just take the short cut and send a message.  But what do I know right?

Well, let me tell you what I know.  E-ho hurts my wallet, insults my intelligence and restricts the number of men I'm able to connect with.  POF is free and lets me message whomever I want, even if they aren't considered a match.  And I like this option, because some days I feel like living on the edge and trying out a type of guy I normally wouldn't.

Anyways, I need to wrap this up and work on my affiliate marketing proposal to E-ho ... I mean E-harmony.  Don't forget to join my Facebook fan page or group page (Serial Online Dater)!  Links are on the side of the blog!

Until next time and happy fishing ;)

3 comments:

  1. I tried E-ho a few years ago and thought the whole thing was a bit of a scam. I didn't find anyone that I wouldn't have noticed on my own trhough POF. Also, E-ho might give you lots of choices in a large city, but having moved around a little during my online dating quests, E-ho didn't cut it in smaller places, there were too few members. POF doesn't lie about the 'plenty' part, sure there are plenty of boneheads, but some good guys too!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ah, Laura, you mistake the forest for the trees... :-)

    There are a few reasons why I like eHarmony.
    1. Your fees go to paying for the advertising which hopefully brings in a new range of people. One of the problems of dating sites is that their definition of success inevitably involves the happy couple leaving the site. Hence, dating sites are always having to advertise.
    2. The communication process has increasing levels of effort as things progress. If one of the people doesn't want to continue then they can just stop and that hurdle weeds out those that are not interested.
    3. The small number of matches delivered every morning and the ease with which the guy (normally) can get things started is very useful. Instead of spending half an hour carefully composing an email to a girl on PoF with no knowledge as to whether there is even a glimmer of interest from her end I can just click the button and wait to see if she responds.
    4. The cost and time commitment of signing up filters out the tyre-kickers. The people on there are genuinely looking.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You make a great point. POF is SUCH a different experience for men. Females get bombarded with messages. Guys dont get messages, they send a ton out and rarely get one back. Id rather pay the money and at least be in a system where i can get a chance to "communicate" with women. With POF i feel like i am playing a video game of sending messages. it sucks.

    ReplyDelete